Pictures and Stories
May 30, 2007 § Leave a comment
I will have pictures and stories up over the next day or two. I think it will be a great lazin’ around the house activity if I laz’ around the house, that is!
3,497.1 miles later…..
May 30, 2007 § Leave a comment
It is so hard to realize that I am actually here in Alaska. Even harder to believe that I drove here alone. It went well. I filled the silence with music and chit chat with myself. Many people kept me company via phone. Thank you for that. I wasn’t sure that I could handle being with myself for that long but it went well. Not too much happened and certainly not a whole lot to talk about but I will get the stories I do have up soon. Tonight I am just going to sleep and enjoy that.
It is beautiful here and everywhere in between. No picture can even begin to capture the scenery. It is more than the scenery though. It is also you and your emotions/feelings that really affect your view. This drive I went through lots of different emotions but the one that really hit me is insignificance. In the grad scheme, in the world at large, I am insignificant. However, I am not in the lives of the people I love and all the lives I touch. All I can do is give and help those within reach. I can affect some. That is where I will place my focus.
There were things that I realized are missing from my life. The most noticeable is the lack of calm in my life. I used to be able to walk into a room and the dynamics would immediately change. Tension would disappear. What happened to that? Where did my calm go? I need to search for that because I do miss. I have not been me of late. That peace and calm has been gone.
I miss me.
I am coming back to myself though.
missoula, montana
May 27, 2007 § Leave a comment
So far, so good. Not much has happened so far on this sojourn of mine. I haven’t reached the remote part of my drive yet though. I am looking forward to it. I wasn’t looking forward to spending this much time by myself Friday night and Saturday morning. In fact, I think I was having these mini-panic attacks. I couldn’t breathe. I even cried here and there. I suddenly did not want to do all that driving alone.
Now that I am doing it, it is going well. I haven’t gone crazy. At least no more than usual. The most exciting thing is that I hit a skunk. Wahoo. No smell though. I was driving too fast. Other than that, I have enjoyed Montana. I have some pics but I don’t know what they look like. I will post them when I get to Mollie’s, which is days away yet. I am excited that I got to get online here for a few minutes any way.
I am going to hit Glacier National Park in an hour or two. I am looking forward to that except that it is raining and I might not get out to see anything. I have no clue. I am just excited to be moving along. Maybe I will save Glacier for another trip. Maybe Mols and I will hit it on our way down. Don’t really know yet. I just know that I am anxious to get up to AK!
Today’s forecast: Rain mixed with peace and calm. Ah, the hum of the tires on the asphalt.
Getting Ready to Go
May 19, 2007 § Leave a comment
Alaska!
I am looking forward to my drive up there but at moments I get nervous about spending that much time with myself. Kinda goofy thing to say but that is what I am thinking. I do feel better now that I have a map and good details on the road and where I will find gas. I am also feeling ready with all of my stuff being packed and my gear is ready. I guess that means that I am ready.
I have no idea what to expect and that is a little bit scary. That is the excitement of it though, the adventure. I know that things will go smoothly but there is always that possibility…. I will have to be careful that I don’t over do the driving. I have a tendency to do that. I can take my time and find it all enjoyable but I am completely jazzed to see Mols so going slow, going steady will be tricky for me.
I know Mom! I will be careful.
The First Chapters
May 2, 2007 § Leave a comment
I wonder why everyone just drops everything to follow Jesus. No one questions. No one says, “um, yeah, let me finish pulling in this here net.”
The impression is given that there were never any questions. I think that is what I struggle most with when it comes to the Bible. That leads me to a lack of credibility. The struggles – well, they are few and glazed over. There is very little that I find inspiring in the Bible. A few lines here and there but or the whole, I am not inspired.
Where is the great inspiration in the book? What is there other than some of the beliefs that people hold as they read it?
Trying to Capture a Memory
May 2, 2007 § Leave a comment
Since my uncle died in mid-March, I have been trying to capture the memories tied up in the loss of a man I hardly knew as an adult but loved more than anything as a child. Beyond that, my attempts have been wrapped around the call of a morning dove. I have yet to meet success with this endeavor. It isn’t the loss so much of the man but that I am now the sole holder of the memory, the memory of the experience.
Fact of life: people die.
Fact of life: memories fade.
Aside from a connection as a child. there was not much else to the relationship but the memories. His smell hangs in my nose, a combination of his cologne and beer. He sat in a lawn chair wearing a white tee-shirt and black slacks. I sat on the arm, dirty from the day’s play, knees scrapped up, elbows bruised. I studied the rising and falling of the doves coo. I perfected it. It became our way of speaking. He’d call, I’d answer. The rise and fall of the coo. He had a family of boys. I was his girl. I just can’t seem to get these thoughts into something more than that.
I think it takes me too long to feel…..
The Reflection Pool 