The Reflection Pool

 
 Knees soiled, cold, and wet
 arms outstretched in front of me

 my forehead has a red patch on it
           centered
 I wait
           prostrate
 I wait
           repeatedly
 cold, wet knees, bruised
 I wait
 and still you elude
 every hole I try to stick you in
 square pegs through round holes
 dinner stuck between my teeth
 simple diets of lessons
 in living, waiting, breathing
 prostration
 waiting
 mourning  the life of past
           - wild - thoughtless - cold
           -never quiet - always
           moving - quick

 past lives mirror the 
 heroics of red wheel barrows
 and dead decaying leaves
 fallen
      lifeless
                winter's long underwear
      spring's light coat
 waiting for a new beginning
 that new life     promised by you
 but it doesn't feel new
 its soggy
           unexciting
                     heavy
 on shoulders and 
 wears out my bending back
 its not the world but it feels like it is
 is it?
 rather than an answer
           verbal
                     obvious
 the weight sets heavier
 on my shoulders
 hints given
                hints taken

 I wait
           unchanging
 I wait
           unremitting (ceaseless)
 bracing my back palms flat
 caloused and rough
                          prostration
 not cowardness     not hiding
 none of these things
 but it looks like it
 seeing me a child's pose
 in a pile on the floor
 withdrawn
           but breathing
 long in
           long out
 not wanting
           not willing
                     waiting
           sustained
                     waiting
           ceaseles

 ceaseless